The Fear When Things Are Going Well

For many, life can seem like a constant see-saw between feeling extreme gratitude and appreciation for what we have and fearing the unknown. 

It's hard to let ourselves experience fully the good in life when we're constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.


When will it all be taken away from me, we wonder. 
Can I allow myself to let my guard down knowing that nothing lasts forever?

Hard things will happen. Anyone who has been alive for any amount of time knows that much. 

But think about something that is precious to you right now in your life. Something with indescribable value in your heart (a degree, a loved one, a sense of peace, for example). Chances are you went though at least some fear, pain, or inner-turmoil to have it. You wouldn't have it if you hadn't. Maybe you went toward this thing with the knowledge that it would be hard-earned but worth it. 

Or maybe it came seemingly from nowhere, an unwanted, unwelcome trespasser in your life that stretched you and grew you in ways you never would have chosen on your own.

Sometimes the fear leads us to more asking in our lives, and the asking leads to growing, and the growing leads to love. Or peace. Or joy. Or mastery. Or all of the above.

"But!" We say, "What about the people who had something unexpected happen and it didn't lead to growth, it led to the loss of a loved one, the loss of health, the loss of livelihood? That could be me too. We don't know that it will always work out for the best."

But the truth is we also don't know that it always won't. And we can't judge the journey of another person before it's over, especially from our vantage point. We can make assumptions and draw conclusions, but we really have no way of knowing what is true for someone else.

Most people are looking for the same things in life: expansion and growth. Peace, joy, and a sense of inner and outer love. They want to live with authenticity, integrity, and sovereignty. We can't judge the paths that get them there.

We can only reflect on our own path and see that things are ultimately always working out for us. 

Look back on your own life and see the truth of that statement. Maybe the difference between devastation and abundance in life is nothing more than perception.


If you would like to talk more about the connection between fear and growth in your own life, call me at (973) 769-2401 or email or simply click here.

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